Studies on memory and intelligence in an aging population suggest that the more you think about losing your memory—the better chance you have of losing your memory. The more you use your memory in your engagement of daily life… the longer it lasts.
If you focus on the problem, it only gets bigger.
Focus the solutions, and the problem diminishes. We don’t have time to focus on all the problems, or we’d have to set up therapy sessions for decades to come. In solution focused therapy (for example) the proof shows that when you focus on a problem… the problem gets bigger. When you focus on the solution… the solution grows.
We deplete our own resources to fight against the very thing we are battling to kill.
Irony seems cruel when you oppose the natural order of things.
Giving effort to overcome past issues is a worthy endeavor. Pretending that there is nothing wrong is senseless!
Annoying circumstances, destructive problems, and reoccurring difficulties are real, however they should never be the default point of focus (at least not for too long). In a fascinating twist of interpersonal physics, the energy source for that fear or habit—becomes you.
- “A good character carries with it the highest power of causing a thing to be believed.”
Aristotle (the Greek philosopher)
- “The power of life and death are in the tongue.”
Jesus (the founder of the world’s largest religion) – “Christianity”
A Game: What’s in your Focus?
If you consider yourself to be shy, take eight minutes to imagine the best case scenario if you were socially confident. Close your eyes and See and Hear yourself in confident conversations. Allow your imagination to play through social interactions with enough detail to mentally and emotionally experience what you desire your current reality to reflect.
Your beliefs may need to get past your memories.
If you’re trying to adjust a habitual occurrence; the more vividly you can see yourself in a ‘character’ that is not historically what you have presented or acted out, the quicker you will enable yourself to be… whomever you have imagined yourself to be.